My God Provides

What good is a blog if you won't share your personal story?  Here is the tension that I have been living with for a while now.  Please understand that I don't spend a lot of my time griping and feeling sorry for myself.  I don't make it a habit to whine about money and then get people to give it to me.  Outside of my time in high school I don't think that money has ever really been that important to me.  With that said...

I understand that I am rich (relatively speaking).  I can eat food and drink clean water.  I sleep on a comfortable bed with a roof over my head.  I own two vehicles.  I can clothe my family.  I have heating and air conditioning available.

I also understand that I do not have as much money as I would like.  My family has not been on a "real" vacation.  Ever.  We rely on special gifts from people and Christmas time to shop for clothes.  My wife watches sales like crazy to stock up on clothes for the kids.  My wife spends about $10 on jeans per year.  She has an amazing ability to dress very well and spend little to no money.  She uses that ability to take care of our family.  This is not a sob story.

I look at Mindy and I understand that she deserves the best that the world has to offer.  She is beautiful and has a wonderful personality.  She is very popular and cares deeply for people.  She will live with very little and never complain.  She deserves to be well dressed and well cared for.  I can not provide that for her.  She will never own a beach house or yacht.  Don't feel bad for me.

I look at my daughter Grace and I understand that she deserves more than I can possibly provide for her.  I don't know if there is a cuter 7 year old on the planet.  She is outgoing and loves to be around people.  She deserves to have access to more than I can give her.  She should dress as well as she looks.  Her outer beauty should reflect her inner beauty.

I look at my only son Willy and I see a blossoming man who deserves more than I can buy him.  Every cowboy needs a horse and I wish I had a Wii so that he could play all the shooting games that he could ever want to.

I look at my youngest daughter Eden and see a beautiful young lady who should have only the best toys.  She should have all the baby clothes, cribs, and strollers that money can buy.  I can not provide those for her.

I said earlier that money has never really meant too much to me.  It only bothers me when I think of my family.  I can not provide for them all of the things I want to give them.  I can not give them all the material things that I would like to give them or for them to have.

I may not be able to buy my wife a diamond bracelet (or diamond anything), but I can give her a faithful and supportive husband.  I can do the dishes without complaining.  I can be a man of honor who does not look at porn on the internet or a man who has unhealthy relationships with other women.  I can give her a husband that she deserves.

I may not be able to buy my daughter all the clothes that would look so cute on her, but I can teach her how do develop her gift of loving people.  I can teach her how to be the best friend that she could possibly be.  I can teach her what love is supposed to be so that some boy won't come along and ruin her life.

I may not be able to provide an ATV for my son Will, but I can teach him what it means to be a man.  I can teach him how to stand up for those who can not stand.  I can teach him how to be a voice for those who have ho voice.

I may not be able to give my youngest daughter Eden all the toys that I would like her to have, but I can show her that she is beautiful the way that God made her.  I can teach her that her value is found in Jesus Christ and not in her looks.

I can teach my family that true happiness comes only from God and not from stuff.  I am not sure why all the financial troubles are hitting my family like they are, but I can do my best to help my family have faith that God will take care of us.

My God provides.  I may never have the money that I would like to have for my family.  That's not what they need though.  They need me to be the best husband, daddy, pastor, and follower of Jesus Christ that I can possibly be.  Thank you God that you provide for us.  (As I wrote that last sentence the sun came out for the first time today here in Lincoln, Il).  Thank you God that you heard me.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Tim - I hope you remember me - Brenda Olson - from Crossroads Church in St. Cloud. I read your blog.... you are richer than many in this world. Richer than those with millions, furs, real estate, cars, etc. Thank you for sharing your heart and your spirit. (and congratulations on the post on Friday!) Your family is also very rich... to have a man like you in their lives.

Continue writing and sharing....
March 8, 2010 at 8:39 PM
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