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Showing posts from October, 2015

What I wish your dad had said to you

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I'm sorry that your dad didn't stick around.  I'm sorry if you never got to know him.  I'm sorry if your dad physically stuck around but emotionally left.  I certainly don't know your circumstance or where you came from.  Even if I did know those things I don't think a person can ever truly understand what is going on in someone else's head. I wish there was more that I could do.  I mean that.  Almost every single time that I get to do a good "dad" thing I think about it.  I think about you and what you didn't have.  I thought about it when I took my oldest daughter to pick out some clothes at goodwill.  She complained that she wanted some new clothes from a popular store.  I kept putting her off.  I put her off for at least an hour and 2 or 3 goodwills.  She kept persisting.  I finally just told her, "Honey, I'm sorry but we can't really afford to get you new clothes at that store.  Mommy and I have 4 kids and we have to buy sev

King of Kings

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Someone’s in charge.  It’s not you.  You already know that though, don’t you?  It’s not the universe.  It’s not public opinion, or the media, or some super-secret group of powerful people.  It’s God.  The immortal, invisible, and all-powerful Creator of all.  He’s the king. This king is not a long ways away.  He is present here and now.  He loves you.  Why?  Well, that’s what He does.  His document for us, the Bible, bleeds with an embarrassment of just how much He loves you.  The Bible isn’t your source?  No worries.  He created everything around you.  The love and encouragement that you receive from your friends and/or family?  His idea.  The beauty in the waves, the mountains, and the setting sun?  All His work.  He didn’t just create it.  He makes is happen every time.  Every molecule in this world is guided by the direct work of His hands.  The joy you get from pouring your life into a cause?  Yep, He made that just for you. God is the King and He’s in charge.  You aren’t

You can change a child's world.

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As long as I have been a Christian I have felt a weight on my shoulders to help those who can't help themselves.  (This isn't a "I'm a hero" post.  I've done so little about that burden, other than just feel it.)  Helping people who need help is a strong value in the Christian faith. I first started feeling this burden when I was a weekend youth pastor.  In college, Mindy and I would drive about an hour, each way, to serve at a little church with about 5-7 middle school and high schoolers.  I saw what some of those kids were going through and I thought that the only way to really make things better for them was to bring them into my home.  I didn't.  We couldn't.  But that thought never left me, "If you want to really change someone's life you have to let them live with you." Several years passed and our family was blessed with having a young woman move in with us.  At the time, it was a tremendous leap of faith for me.  I was in

Peter Cetera

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I listen to Pandora at work almost all day.  I've found that if I am picking what I'm listening to than I focus less on work and think too much about the music, but if I let Pandora make my choices than it fades into the background.  My Pandora is mostly a mix of Dave Matthews, folksy worship, people that sound like Marvin Gaye, and 80's soft rock classics.  I know, I know.  I'm the coolest person you know. This didn't just happen.  I have had the same "station" for 3 years now.  I am the kind of person that will thumbs up and thumbs down so that the algorithm can match my taste exactly.  I think I have arrived.  I seldom have to select anything.  It just knows how I'm feeling and what I need to hear. You know what I need to hear?  I need to hear Peter Cetera.  I can't get enough of him. Obviously this has bothered me for over a year now.  If you were addicted to the music of Peter Cetera wouldn't you be a little bothered as well.  I

Why? Why dad? Dad why? Why?

Two mornings ago I outlawed a word in our family.  I reached the breaking point.  With the two youngest in the kitchen I just blurted out, "You can no longer say "why!"  That word can make my ears start to bleed.  It can make me feel disrespected or untrusted.  It can make me snap like few other words.  There are times when it feels like it's the only word that they say, whether it's the 12 year old or the 4 year old. Go get your shoes on.  Why? Do you have your homework ready?  Why? Time for dinner?  Why? Why do we have to go to school? Why is their no church tonight? Why is this toy broken? Why?  Why?  Why? Kids ask questions.  Aside from being smaller than adults, that may be the most defining characteristic that they have - an incessant desire to ask questions.  Some of the questions are so ridiculous too.  My wife has been talking about this one and we get a great laugh out of it.  For example... Why do I wear socks? Why did I just say th

Mommy's got a baby in her tummy

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I like to do big things.  I like to take little moments and make way too much about them.  It doesn’t always work out well for me or those around me.  After I mow the lawn I will comment about how nice our yard looks about 100 times that day.  It’s not because I’m trying to draw attention to my work or that I am looking for praise, I’m just really captivated by how nice the yard looks when it’s freshly mowed.  I do the same thing with food.  I will talk about “that one meal” way too much, even to the point that I am annoying myself with it.  But I can’t stop making big things out of small things. Strike that. I want to be a dad, husband, and friend who makes things a big deal. So, when it came time for Mindy and I to announce to the kids that we were going to have a baby I knew that we had to do something fun.  We settled with having our friend take pictures of the moment when we told the kids so that we will be able to keep that moment alive forever in print.  I also thou